Helicopter parenting could negatively impact children’s development, according to education experts. A study highlights potential consequences of this overprotective parenting style.
Helicopter parenting is an overprotective and highly involved parenting style, where parents closely monitor and manage nearly every aspect of their children’s lives, often to the detriment of the child’s independence and development. This approach can lead to issues with the child’s mental health and coping skills.
The risks of helicopter parenting: Impact on children’s self-image
German educational scientist, university professor, and author Albert Wunsch has sparked controversy with his theories on modern parenting. In his various parenting guides, Wunsch critiques contemporary parenting styles, particularly what he terms “fun pedagogy.” His ideas have ignited heated debates among parents and educators alike, especially since modern parenting emphasizes nurturing relationships to move away from authoritarian patterns. Many believe that children thrive best when they feel accepted.
Wunsch argues that children today receive too much attention, leading to an inflated sense of self and a diminished understanding that parents cannot always be mentally and physically present. He points to helicopter parents as a prime example, suggesting that this parenting style could result in “spoiled children.” Wunsch advocates for parents to establish more rules rather than engage in excessive discussions with their children. According to him, these discussions undermine parental authority, whereas clear and direct instructions help avoid power struggles and ultimately foster children’s independence.
Overprotectiveness vs. independence: The consequences of excessive care
Wunsch observes that today’s children often lack perseverance, give up quickly, and are generally less resilient. He believes that the increased attention from parents contributes to an inflated self-confidence, which can be detrimental. According to Wunsch, parents are largely responsible for what he sees as poor parenting practices: “Parents too often view their children as their grand project, as little supermen and superwomen. They try to define themselves through their children.”
A study published in the journal Developmental Psychology examined the impact of overprotective parenting on children’s development. The researchers, including Dr. Nicole Perry from the Institute of Child Development at the University of Minnesota, tracked 422 children at the ages of two, five, and ten over an eight-year period. The study focused on parental control during playtime and cleanup activities, and the children’s responses. Additionally, the researchers assessed the children’s emotional regulation, self-control, and frustration tolerance in kindergarten and school.
The study found a correlation between over-controlling mothers of two-year-olds and negative impacts on their children’s emotional and self-control development by the age of five. “Our research suggests that children with helicopter parents may struggle more with the demanding challenges of growing up, especially in navigating the complex school environment,” Dr. Perry told The Guardian. “Children who cannot effectively regulate their emotions and behavior are more likely to disrupt class, have difficulty making friends, and face problems at school.”
Building resilience: A key to modern parenting
While there is not yet extensive scientific evidence from valid studies proving that behavioral disorders are a direct result of helicopter parenting, more comprehensive long-term studies are needed. Additionally, it is essential to determine whether a pathological cause for the “behavioral disorder” exists.
Both parents and experts agree that a healthy relationship is crucial for effective parenting. The only way to establish a trusting relationship with their children, many modern parents find, is to show understanding and allow the child to have a say and self-determination rather than exerting control. This view is shared by diploma educator and bestselling author Susanne Mierau, whose guiding principle is “Attachment is a life theme.”
A growing number of family therapists are finding that children develop best when they feel accepted. The key foundations for this include:
- Binding
- Resilience
- Democratic parenting
“We know that a secure attachment is actually a prerequisite for being able to cope well with challenges, crises, and fears, which means for the development of resilience. Promoting resilience, that is, psychological resilience, is a crucial factor in children’s development and a significant key competence for the future,” says Mierau. In light of today’s crises, such as the COVID-19 pandemic and ongoing conflicts, the development of resilience in children is more important than ever.
